Where are you present and absent in your life?


"Present and Accounted For"

One evening a few years ago, I was in my family room doing some work that I’d brought home from the office. We had a lovely fire burning in the fireplace, and our dogs were nappy on the couch beside me. My husband was asking me some questions, and I thought I was doing a pretty job of working and talking at the same time. Dan surprised me when he remarked that I wasn’t there. I responded that yes, I was there, noting that I hadn’t stayed late at the office any night that week. He clarified for me that while I was there at home in body, I wasn’t fully present….my attention was elsewhere.

I’ve never forgotten that wake-up call. Over the course of the next few years, I made a conscious effort to be “present” when I am at home. My schedule has been fairly demanding, so while I have corrected my attention, I have continued to be a “girl-on-the-go”.

I made an intentional course correction earlier this year. I realized that the fifteen years for which I’ve been married have gone by with the blink of an eye. I will never get to those first fifteen years back again. I have decided to make more family time a priority, and to enjoy the simpler things in life with those closest to me.

And so, I ask you to consider the question, “Where are you present and absent in your life?” If you haven’t done a fearless moral inventory, you may be astonished by how great an emphasis you are putting on doing everything right for work at the expense of home and family.

As a result of my deliberate re-focusing period, I am making careful choices about my work environment and work/life balance. I am not filling every hour of every day with something I need to do.

I am creating space. I have found that when I create space, things that brought me the greatest joy can do so once again. Two weeks ago, I called a former college roommate. I had an extra free evening in Chicago, and made space for a two-hour visit to catch up before dinner with a work colleague. The two-hours spent with my roommate as she prepared for her annual family garage sale were the highlight of my week. It was as if no time had passed, although we needed to catch up on seven years of life. That simple visit energized and grounded me tremendously! We laughed and reminisced and remembered things that time had nearly made me forget.

I have a growing list of things that have been newly prioritized… rekindling friendships, spending time with my parents as they move further into their golden years, visiting family more and doing work that is in-line with my wake-up call.

If you are feeling at odds with whether or not your life is in tune your priorities, you might enjoy a process that can help examine your priorities and create a life that makes you feel alive and connected. I am launching “Building A Powerful Vision Board” in June. You may find that creating a Vision Board helps you connect and reconnect with who and what is most important in your life. The course will be up and online (pretty convenient, yes?) in early June.

Stay tuned and stay tuned in!!

Make it a great week. As always, I welcome your comments 🙂

~ Tess

Copyright 2011

Destiny Rising, LLC

1 Comment (+add yours?)

  1. Carolyn Glade
    May 25, 2011 @ 15:36:43



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